Everything is fixed! Everything - even material is turning right around.
Ok, I have a girlfriend who`s husband is a removalist, she rings me today, we`re chatting, I tell her about my washing machine, she has THREE in her shed! Her hubby hordes everything and gets shit given to him by clients - she`s bringing me out a washing machine tomorrow!!!!!
AND THEN, Bens mum rings me, we`re talking about the truck blowing up, she doesn`t think we should put anymore money into it, I agree - now she`s lending us the money to buy a NEW ONE!!!!!!!!!! (not brand new but enough to get a decent one!!)
How Blessed! I`ve done whatever it was I was sposed to do :D
I learned!
And you know what else, I had a big mental at the colour blue the other day (healing colour), I threw my blue armband out and declared that I hated blue and healing was f*cked cos it`s all lies.
THIS morning when I had a bath my knees started itching, I looked at them and they`re both growing NEW skin!!!!! You can see it rising and spreading over the scar tissue, it`s f*cken amazing!!!!! This beautiful new clear skin!
I`m HEALING!
Then tonight I was sitting on the lounge and Ben says "get fuucked", he`s looking at the top inside of my arm, the last burn to heal, I only stopped wearing the pressure bandage about a month ago, he says"check that out, it`s a pent!"
I have a look and right in the middle of the scar is a f*cking Pent!!
True and for real! I look at that particular scar every day cos it gets tender if I wear a loose top or it rubs on something, so I give it a rub and make sure it`s not doing anything weird and I`ve NEVER seen the pent, now ALL I can see in it is the Pent.
I`ll upload that pic too.
How Blessed am I??!!!!
I had to go through ALLLLLL that bad stuff, which wasn`t really bad cos it was the start of good!!!!
The first card to fall from my deck this morning - after my fathers day dilemma, was The Sun!
Ha!
Father energy everywhere.
Check this out, I`ve had THE worst time happening lately right.
ALLLLLLLL in the material world even extending to the Circle. I went down to the Circle a few weeks ago and someone had been there, they`d had a fire, made a mess, KICKED DOWN the Guardian tree at the entrance and left two chairs there that they`d obviously been sitting on.
I don`t react out of anger if I can help it, and I`m getting really good at it, but this really ****ed with my head, I went down there for clarity to find the real world had ****ed with my Spiritual shit as well aaaand I got angry. Angrier than when they CARVED A CRUCIFIX into one of the trees, which is now known as the Healing tree.
I`d had the f*ck enough and my reaction probably contributed to the last few weeks Karma as well now that I think of it cos it ended at the same spot today.
Sooooo, I threw all of the mess n shit into the fire, threw some dragons blood powder over it, sent ALOT of bad energy into it and lit it, returning every f*cked thing times three back to the invading mother f*ckers that had done this.
Then I got the two chairs and tied them back to back with black ribbon and put sticks under them in the form of a fire, so it looked like it was waiting for someone to be tied to them and burnt like the f*ckers they were.
I cast a protection over the Circle, cried and came home, worse off than I was when I went down there.
I hadn`t been there since. (till today)
Then yesterday, we were going into town to the laundromat, (in the work truck mind you), I looked up toward the circle from the road, the trees look like Maidens dancing on the top of the hill, it`s the most beautiful sight ever, so I`m looking up there and f*ck me if there isn`t a CAR up there!
A F*CKING CAR!
I sent protective energy up to the Circle, worried about it all night and resolved to go down there in the morning and heal what the f*ck ever the horrible mortals did to it this time.
I hoped the chairs scared them!
SO today I go down, I went a different way than I usually do, I don`t know why, I`ve never seen it as clear from the house as I did today and it`s never been so close. As soon as I looked down there the trees started dancing. I actually cut through the neighbours property, (Pete - the lawnmowing -dead guy), we get to the fence at the edge of his property and there`s THREE chairs IDENTICLE to the ones that were left at the circle, on his property all in a row, facing the circle. (and they think I`m f*cken strange)
So I know who`s been f*cking with my circle, Pete has a teenage son and I`m presuming he`d been there with his dad at some stage, but it also proved that he had/has NO respect for the circle and odds are it was one of them that carved the crucifix into the Healing tree, which f*cks with me cos lia and I did a hard core "f*ck you" type thing to whoever did it, so I`m thinkin now that we probably killed the poor dude.
ANYWAY, I keep going, now with the knowledge of who`s f*cked with my shit, so it`s all good, just teenagers, won`t be hard to scare them away, they`re already scared of it, they call it "the Witches place", they don`t know it`s mine either.
But that doesn`t explain the car yesterday.
I head there, now expecting the absolute worst.
I get there and nothing is different, nothing is disturbed, the chairs are still bound, everything is on the Fire Altar where I left it, absolutely nothing was different - except the Owl wasn`t hanging over the ALtar anymore.
On the ground, directly in front of the ALtar was the Owls skull, jaw intact, inside the ALtar were a pile of it`s bones and feathers, on either side of the actual inside of the ALtar was the wings. I walked around the outside of the Circle, there were parts of the Owl and feathers allll the way around! It was awesome!!!
The Circle is protected!
OH and as I walked toward it there were 3 blades of grass sticking up by the Fire ALtar in the shape of the protection symbol.
F*ck I was so happy! I AM so happy!
I took the skull and a few bones, which are now sitting happily on my Hecate Altar in the middle of the Ouija board absorbing the absolute energy of the Circle and it`s protection, not to mention NEW BEGINNINGS!!!!!!
I took pics, I`ll upload them as soon as I find the thingy for the comp.
Then on the way back from the Circle, I came back the way I went, I got the three chairs, put them back to back and put a pile of wood underneath them exactly the same as the way I left the ones at the Circle.
I just had and am still having the fathers day dilemma, I post my blog, watch to check that it shows up and the date on it says "Sunday 15th June" right?
Right.
I read through the blog, I WROTE that it is indeed the 15th of June. *nods*
It`s not the 15th of June and it`s not fu*king fathers day where I`m sitting.
I`m sitting here scratching my head, looking around the room for signs of what ever the f*ck day it is, cos everyones in bed asleep.
Cept the boys - they went to work so it HAS to be Monday. BUT the girls are still in bed and it`s past the bus time, so now I`m thinkin what if it IS f*cken Sunday and I dreamed the boys went to work, they might have gone motor bike riding or wood carting.
OR I`m lazy and don`t want to walk to the bus stop cos my trucks dead, so I let the girls sleep in and have the day off school cos they had a big weekend as well?
The boys could even be in bed for all I know.
Don`t ask me - I`m crazy.
When I was looking at the date(scrolled my mouse over the time in the task bar, it shows the date), when I first saw the fathers day headings - it said 15th June. I wouldn`t have written it if it didn`t.
Everywhere I`m looking here, like HERE *points at screen* people are saying happy fathers day.
IS it fathers day? Am I missing something? I`m lookin at the date and my date says it`s like the 15th of June, so I`m kinda confused. I thought fathers day was in September or somewhere like that?
Is there different fathers days? How weird would that be.
That`s all I can think it would be though, either that or I`ve lost my mind completely this time, cos I don`t ever remember celebrating fathers day in June :S
Maybe I`ve lost my mind.
I could have you know.
I feel like I have.
WHAT`S THE F*CKING GO WITH EVERYONE HAVING FATHERS DAY?????????
I`m not looking at old blogs, I already checked that.
I had a big weekend but I`ve had bigger so I know I still have brain cells, just not sure what the last tally was and if I could afford to lose a few extra.
Fathers day?
I dunno. I`m missing something and I don`t like it ! :'(
I don`t care this morning. I`m keeping my car, I don`t care if the truck gets fixed first, it`s just trivial shit. I like my car, I own my car and I`m keeping my car. I`ll wait till tax time and get it done.
Too easy.
The planets did me no favours yesterday and I know it was an Aquarian thing because SHyla`s an Aquarian as well (Cap cusp), and she was a wee bit irrational about shit yesterday as well.
Ultimately I don`t care, if I have a vehicle I can do what I have to do, big deal what kind it is, it`s better than nothing and I know that when I AM without transport I`d drive a ride on mower if I had to ya know?
So I`ve come to the conclusion that I am a brat, I do have brat attacks, but I get over it. Nobody likes not getting their own way, it`s the human in us.
I have a beautiful roof over my head, the choice of vehicles which most people don`t have and a great family. I have waterfalls less than an hours drive from me and I`m surrounded by complete natural beauty, what kind of person can complain about that?
Me apparently. I need to pull my head in and THAT`S the problem.
The Universe isn`t out to get me, I`m a Divine Child of the Goddess and sometimes the lessons we learn seem f*cked at the time but always a greater good comes from it once you search within, not without. The Goddess doesn`t give a f*ck what kind of car I drive.
I`ve been caught up in the material world, I`ve reacted to being busted arse broke the same way as I did when I did live that life - defensively and aggressively. Instead of acknowledging that I may have contributed to the problem and dealt with it, making sure it doesn`t happen again, which is a plan I put into motion this morning.
I feel peaceful and humbled this morning.
And Blessed with Clarity.
I DO acknowledge that I am a brat and there will be times that I react like one, but I`m forever learning, so maybe next time I`m confronted with a situation I`ll be a bit more rational about the whole thing, especially if it`s a material thing.
Success isn`t that important. It`s noce to be comfortable so you can focus on what you`d like, but that`s not being balanced. You must have the conflict in order to appreciate the peace.
*nods*
I think I got it this time, I`m f*cken glad too cos I`m over feeling like shit and wondering what I`ve done wrong. My reactions have been wrong, nothing else.
Lessons present themselves to teach not hinder, no lesson hinders if you learn from it.
It`s personal choice, my life desire is to learn every lesson I need to learn, to grow every inch I`m meant to and to leave this life with completion, not a half arsed effort that drags my arse back through it, I have a feeling I`ve been through this particular life quite a few times.
I`m not ****ing it up this time.
Something else that I find interesting is I threw one of the rings Lia had given me yesterday, as I was walking home from the breakdown my right hand was swollen, like I`d been bitten by something, the ring started burning and I just got a feeling that there wasn`t alot of positive energy happening from her direction, dunno why, but I knew I had to get the ring off and quick, so I ripped it off and threw it into the creek as we walked by, I think it actually landed on the bank, I`m not sure, I didn`t watch, I just watched long enough to see it disapear and acknowledge that any power energy it was carrying was now non existant. When I got home I took down the picture I have up of us both at the circle. I`m still not 100% sure why, but it felt right.
Last night I did a really full on energy return, I mirrored myself but I also followed all cords back to where they had manifested from, they weren`t very pretty places, but the minds that own the energy now have it back. Their problem now and I don`t feel bad about it either, I never send negative cords out, it`s wrong but it also makes you vulnerable, something I don`t do.
What I DID do was have to much Faith in peoples energy, I forgot that not everyone is a good person.
THEY forgot that I can be a very dark person, I prefer the shadows truth be known. I don`t pretend to be a good person and I don`t pretend to be a bad person, I walk in whichever energy is required of me at the time.
It`s Winter, it`s cold, Persephone has descended, that`s requirement enough for me.
